Speed Dating

It all came about one normal day when I was having a normal lunch with a friend. Over the lunch chit-chat, my friend had the bright idea of trying Speed Dating which was apparently the latest “in thing”.

At first, I was skeptical. Like… do they really have this sort of thing in Penang? Of course they do, my friend assured me. When I’m next online, just go to Google and type “speed dating in Penang”. OK, that sounded simple enough.

So that’s how I ended up, one Sat night, sitting in a fancy restaurant, with a whole bunch of other single or pretending-to-be-single folks. The ground rules was for ladies to remain seated and the guys to rotate around whenever the bell went *ding*. We were each given a fact sheet listing some basic info about our dates and a score sheet to mark whether we would like to meet the person again. Just like on TV.

Date 1: We took our places according to the pre-assigned tables. And then the facilitator proclaimed the magic words to begin. It reminded me of a scene from Roman times, when Caesar would stand up in the colosseum and say…. “Let the Games begin”. Then the lions came in to eat the poor bastard.

With that, my date suddenly sat up and a most attentive and interested expression replaced the previously bored and vacant look on his face. Wow, how artificial can you get?

We chatted about this and that. He turned out to be a Liverpool fan and we started talking about the Man U vs Liverpool game last season when O’ Shea scored the last minute winner. Woo… that’s one game the Scousers would like to forget.

*ding*

Conclusion: Hmm… not sure. Let’s put a “?” for now until we see what the rest of the guys are like.

Date 2: This was by far the longest date because we were having the main course and the facilitator didn’t want to disrupt our meal by ringing the bell. Luckily, we got along quite well and even got around to exchanging fact sheets so that I could see what the other ladies were like. And he could read about the other guys. Checking out the competition ya know.

During the course of conversation, I’m sure I heard him say “Intel sponsored me…” I immediately echoed “WHO sponsors you?”. He repeated but substituted the word “Intel” with “my company”. Hmm…hmm…hmm… I have a bad feeling about this. Must remember to look him up in the company phone book.

Conclusion: Hmm… not sure. Let’s put a “?” for now until we see what the rest of the guys are like.

Date 3: With the 3rd date underway, things were starting to get a bit dreary. I was thinking that they should allow us a “time-out card”. Meaning that if we didn’t feel like talking, then we can just flash the card, sit in silence and eat our food in peace. Without offense to anyone. After all, what’s the point of pretending to be interested in talking, and racking our brains to make all kinds of boring, small talk… when you know and I know that we’re both just waiting for the bell to ring.

I was seated right opposite the facilitator’s table with a good view of the bell. So I found myself staring at it, maybe figuring that if I willed it hard enough, the little bell would get off the table and ring of it’s own accord. I’ve always fancied myself having an innate quality of “mind over matter”. Probably from reading too many “Grey Star” adventure books when I was little. Or too many Luke Skywalker Jedi movies. So far, the force has not been strong with me.

*ding*

Date 4: This turned out to be a guy I had met before, a couple of years back at a party. I did not recognize him until my friend reminded me who he was. He was the guy who had gotten drunk and tried to hit on her friend, which resulted in irritating her so much, she moved off to another table.

OK, drunken + hamsap behavior = immediate disqualification.

When we started talking, I mentioned that I'd met him at that party. He seemed taken aback and repeated a few times that he had been very drunk that night. Mercifully, this date was the shortest. For some unknown reason, the facilitator rang the bell very quickly and it was time to move on. No worries, he assured me that he will be able to contact me through my friend.

Ya, right. As soon as his back was safely turned, I flipped over my score sheet and marked a big “X” in the NO box. With that important bit of business out of the way, I patiently awaited my next date

Date 5: This guy was the weirdest of the lot. His manner was like a guy looking over a horse on auction. He held his fact sheet in one hand and kept peering at it the whole time. He would peer at it, read one fact aloud about me, then look up at me to confirm it.

Eg:
Horse master: So, you are 157 cm tall
Me: Err… ya..

And so on, and so forth. At one point, I was wondering whether he would reach over, open my mouth and start examining my teeth.

*ding*

Conclusion: Quite a nice guy actually….. if I were a horse.

Date 6: Unfortunately, I could not recall anything at all about this date. I was feeling a bit tired and bored by this time. I think it must shown on my face too because the facilitator came over to talk to me during an interval and said that I looked bored. OOPS!! Must work harder on the poker face.

*ding*

And it’s all over folks! Time to say sayonara. The facilitator came around to collect our score sheets. I ended up marking the 1st and 2nd guys. Kiasuism demands that I have to mark somebody. It was an interesting experience. Probably be the first and last time for me though. But then again, who knows.